Avoid
by Peamiin
Summary: If loving you is a sin, then I choose to disappear. - Takao Kazunari


**HELLO hello !**

 **first of all, i want to give much thanks to all of you for visiting my fanfiction !**

 **warning to all of you for all my grammar ERROR and similar to it**

 **im a bit stupid when it comes to english ;9**

 **but i'll try my best to do this !**

 **hope you guys enjoy reading it 3**

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I, Takao Kazunari is in love with Midorima Shintarou.

The first time I met him when we were in middle school. That's when I was defeated by him. Frustrated, but still I was mesmerized at how beautiful his form is when he's shooting the three pointers. Like a bird flying high into the sky.

"I want to defeat him."

That's what I pledge to myself, but not until we met again at Shutoku High. Not as enemy, but as comrade. Hey Shin-chan, do you know how much I want to scream at that time ? I swear to myself that I want to beat you, watching you defeated by me, knees in tears. Yet you stand still high and almighty beside me, on the same floor, same gym.. same school.

You destroyed my pride.

But you know, inside my heart I'm happy. The person whom I admire is standing and playing basketball with me.

"How did he shoot that far ?"

"What kind of training did he do ?"

"I wonder if he will catch my pass ?"

"I want to win together with him."

Wonders that have been lingering my mind as I saw you. I am excited. I let go of my pledge to defeat you, instead I want to win with you, with all Shutoku's players. Until then, I must show my abilities to you. To surprised how good my pass is so you can shoot easier than you used to. So we can win together and be No.1.

And finally, I was acknowledged by you. We win together for many times, it was fun. Never forget that we were beaten by Kagami and Kuroko, Seirin High for the first time. We comfort each other. Do more practice, until we can beat them. I was happy, there's finally a word 'defeat' in your dictionary. And that time you know how I feel when you beat me. But I didn't bear any revenge for you anymore, I love the way we are now, the way we play together as a partner.

Hey Shin-chan,

Did you realize that I was in love with you this entire time ?

"Takao."

"Oh, there you are Shin-chan !"

"Stop with the name and what are you grinning about !?"

"Hahaha, it's nothing. I suddenly remember about the past."

"Hmph. Now let's go back, I'm tired."

"Okay Okay, Ace-sama."

You walk passed me, as if you didn't see me.

Hey Shin-chan, I'm tired of trying to make you notice me as a person. What you saw is only my abilities. What attracted you is only my pass. When will you see me the way I am ? Your eyes can only see me as teammates.

 **I want to give up on loving you.**

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"Um.. Takao-kun"

"Yes ?" _– who is this girl ?_

"Um.. I have an important thing to tell you. So, can we meet at the back of the gym after school today ?"

Ahh.. This must be a confession. It's not that I want to be proud about it but I'm quite popular at school. But all these time, I've been rejecting all confession from girls. It's not like I don't like girls but I don't have anything for them. My passion to basketball and Shin-chan is too strong. Even if I ever have one to date, I don't think that I can spend my time with her. I want to spend as much as my time to play basketball with Shin-chan, even if I had to painfully hide my feelings towards him, rather than some girls whom I did not truly fall in love with. Time with Shin-chan is more precious than anything.

Because I love him too much.

But right now, my mind is filled with frustration and depression. I want to give up on this impossible love. Shin-chan is my best friend, my partner, my world. Losing him is least thing I want, I don't want to ruin our current relationship. Moreover, it's impossible in the first place, both of us are guys, what will be Shin-chan's reaction if he finds out about my feelings, that I like him ? Will he be disgusted with me ? I'm sure he will, that's why it's impossible for me.

 **I never hope for you to love me back or accept this love but if loving you is a sin,**

 **then I choose to disappear.**

"Takao-kun ?"

Maybe I'll try going out with this girl. I'm sorry to be you, you had to be substitutes for Shin-chan. To release my frustration. If you're lucky I might fall in love with you, you're cute anyway.

"Yeah, sure. After school, then."

"Y-yes ! Thank you very much !" _– as the girl smile happily._

I must hurry and forget about him.

"Takao, where are you going ?"

School just ended and Midorima catch Takao's wrist as the boy tried to leave the class in hurry. Something is wrong with him.

"Shin-chan.." Takao averted Midorima's eyes and scratching his head. Slowly he took of Midorima's grip.

"I have to meet someone. Shin-chan, you can go to the club room first."

"I believe you're going to fool around again. Quit it, Takao. Focus on practicing since we have to beat Rakuzan the very next two weeks !"

"Yes, I aware of that and I understand Shin-chan. It's not like I'm not practicing, I just come a bit late. So, can I go now ?"

"Takao !"

Midorima's voice echoes in the hallways making everyone heard his voice and look at them.

"Listen to me, you fool. If it's a girl you're meeting with, you better stop this now !"

"Shin-chan your voice is too loud, people–"

"I don't care about that right now and follow me !"

"SHIN-CHAN !"

Midorima jolted. It was the very first time Takao raised his voice towards him. Something is wrong with him today. Really wrong.

"You know, you don't have to worried about me anymore. No, it's not like you ever worried but–"

"… It's none of your business.."

 _\- Crap, I accidently yell at him._

"A-anyway, I'll come to the club room for sure later, so I'm going now."

Takao hurried walks away passed Midorima and run.

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 **Please review !**


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